My Father, My Hero.

By 7:00 AM , , ,



2015 was the most challenging year of my life, but it was also the most fulfilling. I fell in love again and got engaged to the love of my life, Joyce's Closet did almost 20 times what it did in its first year almost 3 years ago and I also lost one of the most important person in my life, My Father.

My Father was a hard working man who was full of life and had a thirst for knowledge which he impacted on my siblings and I. My Father was a teacher of all things and his method was simple, he taught by example with a dash of love. He was a selfless man who gave up a scholarship to one of the most prestigious Ivy League Universities in the U.S  to care for his siblings and to start a family with my mother. He was a well respected Captain who fought in the Nigerian Biafran War over 50 years ago.

My Father and I shared an unexplainable bond. A bond that we would share until his last breathe. In the two months my father was hospitalized leading up to his death, I made a conscious effort to visit him everyday, but never twice a day. On the day he died, I for some reason went back to the hospital after visiting him in the morning to spend some more time with him. Unbeknownst to me that he would take his last breathe moments after I walked in and die in my hands.

December 14th was my Father's birthday. Not surprisingly, I found him in my dreams two nights ago. I still have a hard time believing that life without him is real, and feel lost every time I think about him. I still remember standing next to his hospital bed holding hands, minutes before he died on September 2nd. At that moment I knew my life would never be the same again.

Every girl's dream is to have their father walk them down the aisle, but I will never get to experience that. I vividly remember a conversation between my Father and I  during a hospital visit 3 weeks before he passed away. He sat in silence for a few minutes, then he looked up at me and said " Does he treat you good?", " Are you sure he is the one?" I was taken aback by these questions and told my Father I had no doubt that he was the one. He looked up at me and said "Then you have my blessing". We both cried in each others arm uncontrollably. I will forever remember that moment and I am grateful we had that conversation.

I live everyday with an unexplained guilt that I didn't spend enough time with my Father or for not telling him all the things I should have. Losing a parent is one of the most devastating things and I don't wish it on anyone. Every day I try to cope emotionally with his loss.... I can only imagine how my mother feels.

I will always have him in my heart and the memories we shared together will live on forever.

I can go on about how amazing and strong my Father was, but you wouldn't understand and I don't expect you to. He was my Father, My Hero and he proved his heroism in the last few months of his life.

I love you Dad.

xoxo

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2 comments

  1. Hi Joyce,
    I'm sorry to hear that you lost your father. I also have a strong bond with my dad and reading your final moments with him, about your engagement, made me cry! I hope you're felling better and while I know nothing will ever fill the space he left in your heart and life, I also hope that the fond memories and lessons he left you carry you through. Congratulations on your engagement and once again, my condolences for your loss.

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    1. Hi Tiffany,

      Thank you so much for taking the time to read and leave a comment. My father was very special to me and his memories will live on. Cherish every moment with your day.

      Happy Holidays

      xo

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